New Resident Evil Movie!

Ladies and Gentlement, I will gladly admit that I'm a fan of this series. It has zombies (my all time favorite) and awesome kick ass action.

I'm totally gunning to make the Alice costume from this movie, as its finally something that I can pull off!

See you guys at the premiere! ;)

Virginity? Fuck that shit.

So, one VH1 today, there's a news program on about "purity" and " the new virginity" and how there's a gigantic market for chastity.

There's the JoBros, Miley Cyrus (alright, so she's probably not a virgin), Selena Gomez, Jordan Sparks have all stated that they've sworn a vow of abstinence to their adoring public and wearing public displays of their promises to God (aka Disney, in my opinion) such as rings, pants, shirts, hoodies, velour sweat pants, and best of all PANTIES! That's right! Now when you're rounding out the bases for a home run, your underwear will remind your heathen partner that "THIS ROAD IS FOR PURITY. EXIT WHEN MARRIED." Hell, there's even Christian shoes now a days.

Now, now, now, virginity is totally cool with me. If you're not ready for sex, you know it. You know yourself better than your father, the media, or JC (well...I'm sure people will argue with me there) and if you don't want to take that path yet, then good for you for being strong enough to make that choice.

"But Jess, its people's choice if they want to make a purity pledge!"

I beg to differ!

Miley Cyrus was on the cover of Vanity Fair (image attached) posing 'topless'. Parents were outraged. Even though she was participating in art, 'good moral standing' adults believed that it was inappropriate for children to see.

Wait...Why the FUCK are your children reading Vanity Fair? Why would they be watching TMZ or Extra with you as you eat your TV dinner? Because you're being a shitty parent, that's why. These adults with 'good moral standing' aren't realizing that if they're doing their job, there's really no reason for their kids to be seeing this photo spread. "But Jess, they might have some naughty friends at school who's parents aren't as awesome as me! They might have printed out the images and plastered them in the hallways saying that "HANNAH MONTANA WANTS YOU TO HAVE SEX! DO IT! Its not my fault!"

No. It is. Because you can't explain to your children that Miley Cyrus is an adult. She's capable of making her own descisions of what she's comfortable with. And also explain to them that Miley "realizes that she had made a mistake by taking these photos in the first place." and 'regretted not standing her ground and refusing to do something that she was uncomfortable with".

Instead of children being able to take in and process forms of sexuality gradually, and letting them realize that sex isn't for everyone, parents make the decision for them. From birth. They block off as many sexually provocative images and scenarios as they can for as long as they can, so that their children can retain their 'purity' and 'innocence'. Then, once the children are presented with sex in an unsupervised situation (i.e. HIGH SCHOOL), they have no idea what to do with it. Its something that's been forbidden to them for so long, Its that "DON'T PUSH THIS BUTTON" complex. They're gonna push that button.

There are several different programs for kids nowadays that promote stay abstinent. Too be honest, I'd probably think that these would be AWESOME for kids who need to be educated on the sexual choices that they'll be presented with and how to handle them. But....these programs don't do that.

Most, if not all, of abstinence programs don't have a focus on the fact that unprotected, promiscuous sex at an early age has a high rate of pregnancy, STDs, and mental problems stemming from the inability to understand what's going on. They don't inform kids about their options if they do run into trouble, whether it be STDs or pregancy, or how to prevent these problems in the first place, if they DO decide that the time is right for them to have sex.

They preach that virginity is one's most precious commodity. To stay pure is to stay valuable. To be Daddy's little girl, you need to be only his little girl and no one else's. Hell, there's Purity Balls for this shit. Where daughter's pledge their loyalty to God and their fathers to stay pure until some jag off can step in and take the reins from Daddy.

Virginity is something that's so 'valuable' to these people that they'll use any means of brainwashing necessary to keep up the charade that their children will never grow up, their daughters won't be enjoying sex, or that their sons will never jerk it into their gym socks.

Why on Earth are we buying kids $600 purity ring (which, to be honest, its really ugly.) (link) instead of teaching them, talking with them, bonding with them about making responsible & adult decisions,  how to deal with the possible consequences of these decisions, or fuck...even how to put on a condom and make them readily available!

Over all, no glove no love, kids. Ask your parents about how you got here, don't believe that stork bullshit. Educate yaselfzz!

I have been changed for good....

I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn. And we are led to those who help us most to grow, If we let them and we help them in return. Well, I don't know if I believe that's true, but I know I'm who I am today because I knew you... 

It well may be that we will never meet again in this lifetime, so let me say, before we part, so much of me is made from what I learned from you. You'll be with me, like a handprint on my heart. And now whatever way, our stories end, I know you have rewritten mine, by being my friend. 

Who can say if I've been changed for the better? I do believe I have been changed for the better. 

Because I knew you. Because I knew you. Because I knew you. I have have been changed for good.

Costumes, Costumes, Costumes!

I, like any other cosplayer, have a problem. Whenever I see a well designed costume, I have a disgustingly strong urge to make it. So, with the rise of popstars like Lady Gaga, Rihanna, and Beyone having a more visual, costume-y style, of course, that urge would arise after viewing videos like Poker Face, Video Phone, and Diva.

To me, these woman are artists to be celebrated. They're doing something different, something visual, something that's beautiful.

Today, I hung out with Jess and Beatriz (New friend? Hopefully! She was awesome!). They were talking about 'rave outfits' that were going to be worn to the Soap Bubble (a late night dance at Anime Central). Jess would be wearing a simpler version of her Midna costume. Beatriz was going to be wearing Shakira's outfit from the "She-Wolf" video.

(---> This was seriously the best photo I could find of the outfit. Shakira is constantly in strange, contorted poses that don't translate well into still photos. P:)

They mentioned that I needed to find a rave outfit. I seriously wondered what the hell I would wear, as I find myself the least attractive of the three of us.

I got to thinking of what would be nice enough to dance in and what I'd feel attractive and awesome in. I believe at some point, a Lady Gaga song came on and a light bulb went off.

The music video for the song "Video Phone" by Beyonce and Lady Gaga had INSPIRED me the first time that I saw it. The outfits and the song itself just clicked with me.

I think that Beyonce's 'Military' outfit from the video would be a good option. It covers the areas that I'm not secure about, as well as covers my face (I realize that I'm NOT black, and therefore shouldn't be going around like "OMGIMTOTALLYBEYONCESTWIN"). My only concern is that I'd be fucking HOT in the thing. Like...sweaty hot, not sexy hot. I'd be looking a hot mess after 15 minutes in the dance.

There are several other outfits in the video that are plausible, some more costumey, some more casual. The black and white outfit at the beginning is OUT. That's the one thing that I find HIDEOUS in my entire recollection of Beyonce images.

The "Rising Sun" outfit that features a bow and arrow is a bit more revealing. Still sexy, still covering the tummy area (which is my area of trouble and dread). But then there's nothing really covering my face. She does have some pretty heavy make up on, which gives me some room to play with the amount of makeup on my face that would change the structure of it a bit.

The boots and gloves would be easy (though the details on the gloves would either need to be on the fabric itself or a LOT of extra work). Hat would be pretty easy to find, I have a hat I could even make a pattern out of a hat that I have. But the leotard would be a bitch. It would be a LOT of pieces serged together, and I'm not too sure if it would look the best that it could be. : /

There's also Lady Gaga though. She has such a great performer. She designs a lot of her own pieces and really uses her own style.

I personally would want to do ---> this outfit from Lady Gaga's "Poker Face" Video.

Its fabulous. You can't deny it. I have an idea of how I would do the mask. The shoulder and hip...pauldrons? I'm not even sure what to call them could be a bit of left over Wonderflex that I'll have from various masks. Regular wetlook spandex for the body suit.


Seriously. I have no idea what I'm going to do. Thoughts!?








<3 Jess

To Nude or Not to Nude?

Throughout the time that I've been considering modeling as a hobby/interest for myself, there's always been a question of "Would you ever model nude?"

Its a good question.

There's the aspect of art that I truly love. The fact that the naked body is something that's sexy and to be proud of, that there's no need to fear being naked. All the possible concepts that nudity can incorporate. Heck, its a large part of modeling. A lot of people specialize in nude (whether it be models or photographers).

But then there's some 'negatives' to it as well, most of them coming down to some people being disapproving of being nude. Family, some friends, what will George think? He says that he'll be okay with it, but I sort of question whether he's just saying that because he believes that adults can make their own decisions and it would be my decision to do or if he truly would be okay with it. I don't want to experience him getting angry or upset over my decision after the fact.

There's a distinction between artistic nude and sexy nude to me. I'm more interested in artistic nude. Sexy nude is something that I feel that I'm not really ready nor confident for. There's also TFP work and paid work. Personally, there are a few photographers that I'd be willing to work with TFP because I feel like they'd really benefit me and my portfolio, but then there are others (and these will probably come after I get more experience) that I'm afraid that I'd only really want to do paid work with. I don't want to be the model who wastes someone's time and money.

I've seen a lot of backlash from people, I guess its mostly other women, who think that modeling nude is disgusting, its porn, and it makes you a whore. The internet is a scary and harsh place. With cosplay, I've already had people sit behind a screen and insult me, call me names. Its something that I know I'm going to have to deal with if I model nude.

Nudity is something new to me. Its something that I've never experienced before. I've done a photoshoot with a "strip poker" theme where I was topless with the goods covered up, and that was alright with me. I was mostly comfortable with that (the awkward that I felt was mainly from not really knowing how to pose or what to do with it)

I've sort of come to the conclusion that I can't decide if I'm comfortable with it just by sitting here and writing about it. Its like I can't tell you if I like horse back riding, if I've never been. It looks fun, people say its awesome, makes for great stories, but I've never been so I'm not sure if I'd like it. (Although, that's just a metaphor. I've really been horse back riding)


I think that I need to at least get in the saddle for a little bit and try it out. If it doesn't work out or if I don't feel alright with it, then there's always costume modeling work that I can 'fall back' on and maybe work my way up to nudity.

If I do decide to go that route with modeling....I'm realizing that I'm going to have to be strong about it. Develop confidence that's deeper than compliments. Ignore 'the haters'.

I guess it comes down to a post that I saw while exploring MM, "No, its YOU who's dissapointing ME." If you can't support the fact that I want to create art that involves me being naked, that I don't really want you to be involved in my life. The only person who's opinions has any heavy input and weight in my decision to model nude is George. And if it comes down to it, we'll cross that bridge when we get there.

First week of February!

Alright, so technically there's only been one day of February so far, so sue me. :P

So far the month has had a fairly awesome start!

This weekend was meant to be hectic. George would be gone for most of it, driving around, while I was working and sewing. He went to the gym late Friday (where upon he usually spends about 3 hours working out) and dropping off laundry.

I came home from work around 8:30, sat down, ate my food, started to unwind. All of a sudden I hear this loud buzzing noise. The fire alarm went off in our apartment complex/building at 9:00 at night, forcing everyone to go outside in the blistering cold and wait for the firemen to arrive. They deduced that it was a cooking fire and no one got hurt. Good way to bond with your neighbors dogs. :)

Saturday was fun at Medieval Times after a day of running around, sewing, and writing. But I'll get to that business in a moment. I want to get to the part that makes me excited for February.

George picked up his/our cat, Snickers, from a friend's house that she's been staying at (since we didn't want to pay a $300 deposit on her). She'd been trying to bite and claw at Jenna's kid, Amelia, and was no longer welcome there. What a bitch, right?! So George said that he'd bring her over to visit for a little bit before he took her to Indiana to stay with his parents until November (when we move out of this shithole.) and bring her to visit he did. We got her used to the place. Played with her. She seemed weary at first, but then she gradually grew comfortable and started meowing, cuddling, and exploring.

I kept joking about keeping her here, without our landlord people knowing. Not paying the deposit. Keeping her. Loving her. Having his/our baby back. He kept trying to brush me off, mentioning the deposit and the money that it would cost to keep her around to me, as a deterrent from getting too attached. But after a while...he basically broke down. He finally tweeted "I couldn't do it. I couldn't give my cat away again. She's staying."

I seriously wish that I could explain to you guys how happy he was. I've only ever seen him get that happy a few times. It was awesome.

Yes, we're going to pay the the deposit in good time, but as of right now. She's hanging out illegally. :)

So, after we decided to snatch our cat back into our lives, it was time for me to head out to Kearstin's for Medieval Times! It was my first time going out of my 19 years, so I had no idea what to expect. I expected awesome, but I had no idea!

Kearstin and Rich were there to celebrate Nash's birthday too and they'd been there before, so I imagine that they got kinda annoyed with my girlish screams of "I WANNA WORK HERE." But it was amazing. For those of you who don't know what it is, its basically a giant castle sitting off the highway and inside, its got the space to reenact a battle/joust/tournament from Medieval times (I'm not entirely sure it has an actual time period). They have horses, hawks, knights, and a King and Princess. They all talk in British accents and say "M'lord" and "M'lady". The basic principle is that all the people who're coming there are nobility that are there to celebrate something or other (this time it was a peace treaty). During the dinner and tournament, they have a plot unfold and a battle commence, where one knight wins.

Oh, and no silverware! You eat everything with you're hands! That was fun! We had chicken (like, a whole, tiny little chicken), a rat tail (a single rib), garlic bread, and soup. Delicious.

I came home and George had gotten back from his parents to do laundry. He was waiting on Jon to come over and hang out.

When Jon got to our house, he came bearing Taco Bell, and so we feasted. I went to bed around 2, having to be up early the next day for a Toy Show that we were selling stuff at. George apparently didn't go to bed until around four. In a drunken stupor off of Hurricanes, he tried to feed me his leftover ice cream while I was asleep. I personally have no recollection of this! Hahahaha.

But the next day we slept in, or course, and then got up to go sell stuff.  Needless too say, George wasn't in the best mood. Ha.

We didn't sell as much as we wanted too, but hey, at least we sold some stuff! George made way more money than I did, but then again, he was selling stuff people actually cared about. All I had in my shortbox was a SHIT TON of Gambit and Rogue comics. But people bought a few, which made me feel less shitty about my teenage fangirl-ness.  But George was saying that we'd probably sell more if I showed a little skin. My reaction. --->

It was a lot of old dudes selling Hot Wheels and stuff. So the only thing that I bought that day was a Harley Quinn statue off of Rich. :)